Exercising Self-Control
For most of my life, self-control has felt like
a reservoir that drains over the course of a day. I could resist a donut in the
morning, but all will was gone by the time I tried avoiding a Mountain Dew with
lunch. In the short-term (like the course of day), feeling this way is normal,
according to most self-control research. We experience what professional psychologists
would call "ego depletion."
Fortunately however, there is evidence that
self-control is like a muscle that can be strengthened over time. The idea is
that the more often a person exercises their self-control, the more easily they
can exert it in later tests. This is how I have reframed my thinking about self-control,
and I've found it helpful. Whether trying to "exercise" self-control works
or not, I have found that believing it does is enough to help me stick to my
efforts, like some sort of placebo. (Placebos can still
work even if we know we are taking a placebo.) Instead of thinking that
"Well, I already resisted the temptation of a donut, I deserve the
Mountain Dew," I reset to "If I could be strong against a donut, I
can be strong against a Mountain Dew."
Testing Self-Control
The Marshmallow
Test was a series of studies out of Stanford that were designed to measure the
self-control of children. The test was performed giving young children a choice
of a single immediate reward (a marshmallow or cookie), or a greater reward if
they were able to wait at least 15 minutes. Many years later, the researchers found
that the children who were able to wait for the greater reward had healthier
BMIs, higher standardized test scores and had achieved higher levels of
education. Other than being a test that I will try to shape my future children into
responding to correctly, I find that it is a supporting piece of research that
self-control can be a muscle, particularly that self-control against one
temptation can cover more than a single domain. Children that can resist the
immediate cookie can resist other kinds of negative temptations elsewhere in
their lives.
I think that viewing self-control as a muscle is
a big part of why keystone
habits work. It is not just that I don't want to negate my morning's workout
with a chocolate brownie after dinner, but it is because I had the self-control
to go the gym that I can also skip dessert.
"Dopamine Fasting" AKA the Self-Control
Superset
Dopamine fasting is a new buzzword, allegedly
popular among Bay Area Yo-Pros, that is the attempt to avoid producing dopamine
in the brain. The idea is that because we are constantly hearing music, having conversation,
connected to the internet, eating junk food, etc. that we long longer
appreciate the small joys in life.
Apparently, that is not
exactly how it works, but the idea is the same. After we experience something
pleasurable the first time, our brain actually releases dopamine as we crave to
repeat the thing that brought us pleasure the first time. So, by avoiding
pleasurable activities one is not actually reducing the amount of dopamine released
in their brain, but it does help to break habits reinforced by dopamine.
I'm still waiting for the opportunity for a
silent meditation retreat, but once I do I will sardonically refer to it as a "dopamine fast."
